Film Review: Ernest Saves Christmas

 "Ernest Saves Christmas"

* 1\2 (out of ****)

Saving Christmas is easy! The movie on the other hand...

Back in October I dedicated the month to horror movies and a case of nostalgia got the best of me. I reviewed the comedy / horror movie "Ernest Scared Stupid" (1991). I mentioned I hadn't watched an Ernest movie in about 30 years. As I prepared for December and spending the month reviewing Christmas themed movies, I thought why not take another trip and visit my friend Ernest, knowhutImean?

"Ernest Saves Christmas" (1988) was the third feature-length movie to present the Ernest character and was the second movie in the official Ernest series. It was also the most successful at the box-office, grossing more than 28 million.

I'm not as familiar with the Ernest P. Worrell (Jim Varney) character as I used to be but "Ernest Saves Christmas" was not the movie I was expecting it to be. Having "Ernest Scared Stupid" somewhat fresh in my mind, I was anticipating "Ernest Saves Christmas" to be kid friendly entertainment and for Ernest to be a man-child character - an adult with an innocence associated with a child. That's not how I felt watching this movie.

On one hand "Ernest Saves Christmas" is more of a straight forward comedy. It is still a kid friendly movie but Ernest isn't really presented as an innocent man-child character. He is just a dim-witted fool. He was always an adult to me and other characters he interacts with regard him as such. Compare this to "Ernest Scared Stupid" and notice how the Ernest character primarily interacts with children and is presented as being at their same intellectual level. Even the adults in that movie treated him as a child. Not so in "Ernest Saves Christmas". I would imagine the character was still being developed.

The other thing I noticed watching this movie is it plays like a giant advertisement. Remember, originally Jim Varney and John Cherry created the character to appear in commercials pushing various products. Pay attention to all of the product placement running throughout this movie! As soon as the credits begin we see various animated images of Santa Claus, notice how he is holding a bottle of Coca-Cola in some of the images. The Ernest character was at one time featured in Coca-Cola commercials! There was no reason to place images of Santa with a Coca-Cola bottle in the movie if not to advertise the soda product.

And it's not just Coca-Cola, you'll see advertising for Bic pens, National Car Rental, Ryder Rental Trucks and Eastern Airlines! This isn't a movie, it's advertising space!

The movie's director, John Cherry - who sadly died earlier this year - was an executive vice-president at an advertising agency, which explains a lot about this movie. Not just the product placement but also the amateur filmmaking. There are a lot of unusual camera shots in the movie - mostly positioning the camera at the ground level looking up at Ernest. Cherry also goes back to Ernest's advertising gimmick of having an off-screen neighbor named Vern, to whom he was usually pitching a product to. There is a completely unnecessary sequence here involving Ernest paying his old friend Vern a visit.  

In "Ernest Saves Christmas" Ernest is a Florida taxi driver. We first see him with an impatient passenger eager to get to the airport. Ernest informs the passenger he need not worry and then proceeds to mistake the highway for an Indianapolis 500 race course, zig-zagging pass cars while his passenger slides from side to side in the back seat. 

It is at the airport Ernest meets a seemingly nice older gentlemen (Douglas Seale), kind of jolly looking with a white beard. He says he has come to Orlando to find a replacement for his duties. He also informs us, his name is Santa Claus. You see, it's time for jolly ol' St. Nick to pack his bags. He has been the official Santa Claus since 1899 and his memory is starting to slip. It has gotten to the point Santa has to jolt down notes to remind him of what children want for Christmas! 

The new man for the job might be Joe Carruthers (Oliver Clark), the former host of a weekly children's television show. Santa believes Joe's dedication to helping and teaching children makes him the perfect candidate to become the new Santa. Now all Santa has to do is convince Joe of who he really is and get Joe to agree to take the position.

For a movie with this kind of plot, "Ernest Saves Christmas" doesn't feel magical. It doesn't fill us with the Christmas spirit and a sense of joy. I wouldn't describe this as a "feel good" movie. "Ernest Saves Christmas" should have used the classic Christmas movie "Miracle on 34th Street" (1947) as an inspiration. There was a movie about Santa trying to convince others he is real and tries to protect his image and keep the spirit of Christmas alive. "Ernest Saves Christmas" doesn't even come close to accomplishing this.

If that wasn't bad enough, the movie isn't funny. I wasn't expecting a laugh-out-loud riot but I did think the movie would get a chuckle or two out of me. I didn't care for "Ernest Scared Stupid" but did admit I found moments amusing and even went as far as saying the Ernest character was everything you could want a comedic character to be - brash, confident, a self-proclaimed foremost authority on any given subject. But here Varney's talents are completely wasted. Varney only has a handful of comedic tricks up his sleeve that he constantly calls back to - namely making silly facial expressions by squishing his face. It wasn't funny the first time and it's not funny the 10th time.

To try and give the movie some redeeming value the movie throws in a troubled teen character, Pamela (Noelle Parker). We never get her full background story but we can pick up she has run away from home. Continuing on her path of making bad choices she decides to stick around Ernest and Santa. Pamela is meant to be the heart of the movie and provide us with some sort of theme about having faith in people. The problem is the Pamela character never earns our sympathy.

But how much heart can the movie have when its one objective seems to be about commercialism with all the product placement. What exactly is the point of this movie? What is an audience suppose to feel after watching it? Gee, I could sure go for a Coke right about now!

I think what would have made "Ernest Saves Christmas" work is everything  I said was wrong with "Ernest Scared Stupid". This needed to be a lot more kiddie. Ernest needed to be a full blown child that believes in Santa and even claims to have met him - in order to impress other children. He needed to be filled with the Christmas spirit. Then he meets Santa and perhaps only briefly doubts him but after giving him a quiz comes to believe. Throw in the troublesome family plot as they come to learn the meaning of Christmas and there you have it! A sappy, predictable, harmless family comedy about Christmas.

"Ernest Saves Christmas" is not a good movie. Not even for children. It lacks the Christmas spirit, a positive message, laughs, heart, interesting characters, good direction and good cinematography. Other than that, it's worth watching.